I've never been very good at keeping my feelings in. Sometimes that is a good thing, other times...not so much.
I'm feeling stuck in a rut. I'm sick of this feeling. I'm sick of this rut. So I was determined to shake it off today. I woke up, showered before Dan left. Opened all the blinds and windows. Cleaned the kitchen. Helped Camden make the lunch of his choice. Sat outside and participated in the picnic lunch. Read my boys a bazillion books before nap.
And then I felt it coming on. I fell. I fell back into my rut.
I sat down.
I began feeling sorry for myself and all the things I don't like right now.
Ate myself sick with an ice cream snickers, Dr. Pepper, and homemade mac and cheese. I looked out the window and saw it sprinkling, and thought...I feel blue.
Stupid blue, you used to be my favorite color.